Stop and Sit…

I love to sabotage myself. It seems I have some sick satisfaction to create chaos and try to get myself out of it! Like those delightful mazes in the Highlite Magazines. It starts rather innocently usually when things are calm. I guess I don’t like calm, because I find things like redoing my condo, taking an on line course, writing three blogs, running my school,training. Yet that’s not enough, so I add; Buying a new computer, changing my business software and billing company. The stress has played havoc with my mental and physical states.

So this weekend I stopped, I walked (didn’t run), read, slept, enjoyed visiting with my family. I didn’t rush out and go to do more work. I stayed and played with the dogs and cats. I sat on benches in the park, rocks by the water, in my mom’s kitchen, in my cousins home and just riding in my car.

What is the point? The point is we all create our own chaos.  The only way to get out of the maze we created is to stop and sit. After some soul searching, mind clearing, body resting we may be able to find our way back…

Just another Bozo on the Bus

Ginnie

 

Chaos Addiction?

I’ve been inconsistent with my posts as of late. This is due to the fact I’m in the midst of Chaos — A Chaos I created. Someone told me once that ACOA (adult children of alcoholics) crave structure but create chaos. I’m assuming it’s because it’s what we’re used to… I guess this is why I’m in the middle of it now.

I recently decided to redo my condo, so I’m in the middle of painting it. I also decided to upgrade my businesses’ Web site, computer system, business software and changed billing companies. So all of these chores are mounted on top of the endless work I have already. None of this includes trying to have a life outside of painting my condo and inputting data into my computer…

What was I thinking? I obviously wasn’t. Maybe having things spiral out of control, is  a crazy addiction to the adrenaline rush from the stress. Thankfully I have understanding friends and a great pair of running shoes!

Ginnie

Harsh Realities…

I’ve had a lot of difficult news to absorb in the past thirty-six hours. The problem is this type of news happens everyday.  I’ve listened to and read about, child abuse, and molestation, suicide, alcoholism, health disorders, emotional outbursts and heartache! These are the harsh realities of the world we live in…

The flip side is, we have a choice on how we process this “reality”. Do we allow ourselves to spiral into a deep hole of despair or  choose a better way? A way in which we turn hopeless into helpful. We need to use our inner resources to come up with ways to mentor, comfort, raise awareness and funds to combat these horrific issues.

We need to face our own demons and learn to love ourselves. Then we can move  forward to help others, and become part of solutions rather than the cover ups…

 

Blessings,

Ginnie

Fallen Idols

I was informed today of a recent suicide. The person who called me said, “I’m in shock, he had everything.” “Why would he do this?” How often have we heard these very words, when someone who is thought to be an icon in the public eye, does something we believe is out of character?  The truer question, out of character for whom the icon or the person?

My dear Portuguese grandmother used to say ,”What’s for you is for no one else.” Truer words were never spoken. In this world of Idols, American and otherwise, we spend too much time with the persona. Not enough time with the PERSON! So many of us are looking to  sports, entertainment and personal heroes to idolize, we forget to realize they are human. While its okay to appreciate, talent, accomplishments and good works of people. We can’t lose sight that they are still people, struggling to find themselves in the world.

We need to look inward to the God within us, and revere that part of us and that part in others. This way we don’t end up idolizing false gods and being shocked when we find out they were human after all…

Namaste,

 

Ginnie

 

Where I’m Lead…

I’ve always been surprised by where my intuition leads me. I try to listen to and follow its instructions as often as possible, but all too often I get lost in THOUGHT. Thankfully I’ve been clearheaded these past weeks post sixth dan test, and I’ve been discovering and rediscovering all sorts of wonderful gifts. First I found myself rereading Jonathan Livingston Seagull for the twentieth odd time. I was enlightened once again.

When I first stumbled upon JSL in the 70’s I was touched by the plight of Jonathan and his unconventionality. I felt we were kindred souls. At the time I felt like an outcast. Questioning the dogma of a religion I was raised with, and the conventional life so many of my friends were aspiring to. Like Jon I tried fitting in with the flock. I enrolled in nursing school to get a “good” job. So I could live day-to-day until I retired. Except I go Where I’m Lead, and that was to the door of a martial arts school .The rest they say is history!

This time I looked at the whole story of Jon and his accent to mastery and his passion for teaching. This hit me so hard between the eyes, I cried. It was as if I rediscovered myself . Then today I decided to look up Richard Bach and stumbled upon his blog! The man isn’t done teaching me yet!

Her race to learn had begun…

Ginnie

 

 

Surprised With My Words…

You always need to watch out what you say or write because your words may come back to haunt you… My father used to say that to me all the time; mostly because of my quick comebacks and sassy tung. I never thought I would be surprised to see my own words…  Such was the case tonight, when a dear friend and my students surprised me with a scrap book that included my blogs and photography! WOW!!!

Surprised doesn’t begin to describe how I felt – Shock and awe would be more apt – Not because of seeing my words and photography, but the love and care that went into putting it all together. Wow, I said it again, Wow… I am so very blessed to have people in my life who’d go to such lengths to help me celebrate my Sixth Dan!

So for the first time, words fail me, and I wouldn’t know how to capture this feeling in a photograph. I guess all I have to offer is love and gratitude…

Namaste, Carol and your elves…

Master Amaral (Ginnie)

Looking Forward…

What do you do after completing or reaching a goal? For me I look forward to the next adventure or challenge…

I was tested for my sixth dan (6th degree black belt) this past Saturday. The training and preparation were fairly intense. To say I was focused would be an understatement! I loved the challenges this test brought. I wondered how or if my age would be a factor either with the training or the test – Other than a few nagging injuries that could have cropped up at any age the effect was minimal. In fact the experience benefitted me. I was better prepared for this test than any of the previous tests I’ve taken.

So with the test in my rearview, what’s next? First I need to get over this mild sense of post test let down. After training so hard for so long I feel a little at loose ends… It’s not like I haven’t anything to do – Believe me there are plenty of chores and projects that were put on hold that I need to get to – It ‘s the Looking Forward to and working toward something big, that I miss. Which means get myself in gear for the next challenge – Does  a half marathon seem big enough? I’ll let you know August 20th!

Ginnie

Quotes…

Today I was finishing up my essays for my upcoming sixth dan exam. I like to insert appropriate quotes at the beginning of each essay answer. In my search I found two of my favorite, one From George Bernard Shaw and the other from Lao Tzu’s Hua Hu Ching. I’d like to share parts of those quotes in this blog.

First George Bernard Shaw, This is the true joy in life: The being used for a purpose recognized by your self as a might one.

It goes on from there, but like a great introductory sentence it states the whole thought perfectly! No truer sentiment has been made. We all come alive when we do what we love for a greater purpose. This could be  as simple as cooking a meal for your family or it could be as big as discovering a cure for cancer! What ever the purpose make it a might one!

The second comes from The Hua Hu Ching or the Unknown Teachings of Lao Tzu, translated by Brian Walker.

#54  Lines 2,3,and 4: These subtle arts were created through the linking of individual minds with the universal mind.

They are still taught by traditional teachers to those who display virtue and desire to assist others.

The student who seeks out and studies these teachings furthers the evolution of mankind as well as her own spiritual unfolding.

Again this reminds me of my path and my purpose to study and teach what I’ve learned. To be a vital force in my circle of influence.

When you read great words, or see great works it inspires you to do the same…

I hope these words I’ve shared today will do just that to all who take the time to read this blog.

Namaste,

Ginnie